Mixed Messages

Copyright©2012 by Karyn Garvin

Most people would agree that they would do almost anything to keep their dogs safe at home. We love our dogs; they are important members of our family. The idea of anything happening to them is horrifying. Yet thousands of dogs, even well trained dogs are still running away from home. What’s with that?

Dog owners are certainly better informed and more sophisticated than ever before. They seemingly have all the right tools to raise happy, well-trained, well-socialized pets. Many communities now have dog parks to help socialize and exercise your young dogs. Puppies are starting training at that critical age of eight to ten weeks. Most dog owners take their dogs thru obedience training to make sure they teach their pets to come when they call them. As a matter of fact the key reasons people train their dogs is to ensure that the dog will come when they call them so that they don’t have a dog that will run off.

So why then, when you did the puppy training, you went to obedience training, you even took your dog to doggy day care does this same dog take off when it gets out the front door? How did they learn that? One possible answer is that You may have been sending mixed messages. You may have taught your dog to do that.

When you and your dog go out the front door what do you do with them? If you’re like most dog owners you leave the property with your dog and take them for a walk. You’re the one that taught them when we go out front we just keep on going. That’s what’s fun! That’s how you get exercise! That’s how you see the world. Here in then lies the mixed message. You don’t want a dog that leaves the property but that’s what You always do with them.

It may be time for you to send a new message! Even better if you have a new puppy it’s a great time to teach your puppy what you really want them to know which is when we go out front we turn around and come back in. The good news is that you can retrain and establish new habits. A great exercise to do with your dog would be to go out the front door, go check the mail and come back in. Go out the front door and come back in through the garage door. Go out the garage door and come back in the front door. Go out, come in, go out, and come back in. This is what you want to communicate, and demonstrate. If you have flowers in the front yard, go out with your dog, water the flowers and come back in. Practice your obedience training in the front yard putting your dog in a sit stay and then calling them back in the house. You want your dogs experience to be predominantly that when you take your dog out the front door you end up turning around and coming back inside. It’s all about balance. Be creative and send the right message!

Divine By Nature … Not By Behavior

In my earlier years, I fell into the trap of believing that certain dog behaviors were bad. As a matter of fact, the first book that I carried around like a Bible in the 1970s was titled “Behavior Problems In Dogs,” published by the American Veterinary Association. The problem in today’s world is that this kind of language has permeated our thinking!

• How to Stop Jumping Up
• How to Stop Chewing
• Dog Behavior Problems (followed by a list of dogs’ innate behaviors such as chewing, barking, licking, digging, etc.)
• Correcting Bad Dog Behavior

The problem with this kind of language is that it has influenced ways of thinking to the point that people actually believe that not only are these behaviors bad, but that the dog is bad for doing them. The words we use create thoughts. Our thoughts about things are reflected in our behavior. It is an illusion and bad instruction to insinuate that anyone can stop all jumping. This just leads dog owners to believe that either they are failures, or there’s something wrong with their dogs. Once again, this kind of language suggests there is a problem within the dog.

Today, I have clients coming in saying things under their breath as if confessing to their dog’s sins. “My dog puts his feet up on me, isn’t that bad?” “My dog digs in the back yard; it doesn’t bother me, but isn’t that bad?” “My dog’s a jumper!” What have we taught these people? What have we done to the dog? This madness needs to STOP!!!!

Behavior Overview
Do you realize that all behavior is either innate or learned? This is true for people as well as animals. Innate behaviors are never going away for good, but they can be managed. Only learned behaviors can be extinguished.

Let’s take a person for example: Is breathing innate or learned? The correct answer is innate, and we will breathe our entire lives. Now let’s take the example of a person smoking cigarettes. Would this behavior be innate or learned? The answer is learned, of course, and yes, a person can quit smoking cigarettes once and for all.

Now back to the dog, and let’s take barking for example. Is it innate or learned? It’s innate! Barking, licking and digging are all innate behaviors that are manageable, but they are never going away for good.

Likewise, to the dogs’ defense, all jumping for joy cannot be bad either. Expecting a little dog to never jump is about as ridiculous to me as a person who expects a dog to never bark. When we argue with Mother Nature we will lose!

The real message here is to live our lives accordingly … according to what is appropriate at the time. If Bobby, your twelve-year-old next-door neighbor, is coming to visit and he loves it and laughs and giggles when your dog greets him jumping and licking, then let it be. It’s not as if killing their fun would erase your dog’s desire or natural tendency to be a dog.

On the other hand, if it’s ninety-five-year-old Aunt Louise coming to visit, and just your dog bumping into her could knock her down, then you want to show good leadership and manage your dog. But you don’t get to holler, “Sorry Aunt Louise, that dog knows better!” He doesn’t know better. He is a dog.

What’s Consistent Is What You Say Goes!

One of my favorite mentors is Dr. Wayne Dyer. He is well known for the saying: “When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.” Believing the dog knows better places the responsibility on the dog and sets you up for disappointment. Assuming you need to manage your dog’s behavior will empower you. Once again, “When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change!”

After all, the dog was created perfectly divine, just the way it is!

The Evidence Did Not Add Up

Recently I went to a very interesting and unusual appointment at a client’s home.  Typically when I arrive, I am carrying a 5×7 card, which my office has given me, containing the client’s information.  The notes on this particular card told me that this family had two dogs, Winchester and Malcolm, and that they were not getting along.   Nothing too unusual about that.

I rang the doorbell, which triggered a huge fiasco.  This family actually owned a number of dogs.  There were several English Pointers barking and running to the door, and a Border Collie.  The youngest daughter, who I’m guessing was probably nine or ten years of age, was screaming, “Don’t let the dogs out!”  This, of course, gave me some insight as to the state of things, as I squeezed my way in, heeding the daughter’s advice.

What I noticed immediately was that Malcolm, an older Border Collie, had a ton of staple stitches which went all across the back of the base of his head and continued underneath to the front of his throat.  This was a fearsome injury!  This was life- threatening damage, and in a moment, I knew that if the dogs were fighting to that degree, one dog needed to be placed in another home.  This ranked as some of the worst damage I had ever seen!  Nevertheless, I hid my initial shock, didn’t say a word about the injuries, and knew not to have my mind made up until I knew more.

Whenever I first enter a client’s home, I’m always looking to set up my workstation.  In other words, I like to sit at a table with chairs so that I can begin asking questions and make my notes.  We worked our way toward the kitchen table, and the whole family joined in, including the husband, wife, and two daughters.  As I was trying to get everybody corralled to the table I couldn’t help but notice the youngest daughter, almost hysterical about the dogs getting together, and worried about a fight.  She was yelling, “No!!! Don’t let the dogs get together!  They are going to get in a fight!”  And the mother’s reaction to this was even more peculiar.  She was very, very calm and said, “You know what? Don’t worry about it, honey.  They only fight when we are gone.”

What was very weird was looking at the youngest daughter, who was legitimately terrified about these dogs getting together and fighting, while both parents and the older sister were very calm and not even concerned.  Really?  Once again, the mother repeated in her calming voice, “Honey, don’t worry.  They only fight when we are gone.” Looking at the life-threatening injuries I wondered if the youngest daughter was the only one with good sense, or what the heck was going on here?

My interest was certainly peaked!  Getting to the truth of the matter, I learned that the owners believed that one of their dogs, Winchester, a one-and-a-half-year-old unneutered male English Pointer, had injured Malcolm, the eight-year-old Border Collie, while they were out of town.  They had a house sitter staying at the house, and she came home to find Malcolm torn up in the yard. Winchester was the only dog with him, and he also had a considerable amount of blood and stool on him.  This also meant that Malcolm was so terrified during the fight that he had let go of his bowels.

The husband shared that he had purchased Winchester as an eight-week-old pup. Winchester came from excellent breeding, and his sire and dame were award winning hunting dogs.  Winchester was purchased to be a hunting dog.  Malcolm and Winchester had lived together since Winchester came into the house at eight weeks. Truly, Winchester did seem happy, well bred, soft mannered and very stable.

My next question was, “What do you mean they only fight when you’re gone?”  They explained that the only time there had been a fight with injuries was this one time while they were out of town.  The owners acknowledged that there had been some growling going on over food and toys.  So my next question was, “Were there ever any injuries?” The answer was, “Oh no, no, just a little minor growling, and we would separate them, and that would be the end of it.”

So now, this is getting even more peculiar.  The types of injuries that Malcolm sustained are not first-fight level injuries. What I mean by that is that the level of force and injuries sustained during fighting tends to escalate with fights.  In other words, the very first fight between two dogs usually begins with noise and no injuries.  Then, as the fights continue, both fighters get more and more proficient and the degree of injuries escalate.  It might go from minor scratches to puncture wounds to lacerations requiring stitches.   I know that the level of injuries like the ones Malcolm had are not with a first-time fight.  Not that anything is impossible, but let’s just say it was highly improbable.

The next thing that made no sense is that dog fights are much more likely to occur when people are present, as opposed to when the owners are gone.  As a matter of fact, it’s suggested statistically that approximately 90% of the time, fights only occur when people are there. The reason is, people tend to enroll themselves in fights in a way that dogs actually find rewarding.  A more common progression would be that there would have been a number of fights when the owners were there, and that the fights would have escalated to the degree that there are injuries.  First, it starts with minor injuries, and then the injuries get more and more severe until the dogs and owners are going to the vet for medical attention.  Even at this level, the owner’s negative reinforcement is a huge reward, but there is still hope for help.  Once I hear that the dogs are now fighting even when the owners are nowhere around … now you have two dogs that have grown to truly dislike each other, as opposed to doing it for negative attention.  This really adds to the severity of the situation.

Two dogs fighting with no one around indicates I am dealing with two dogs that really do hate each other.  This wasn’t the case.  These dogs didn’t hate each other.  They were running around together.  The whole story was very, very peculiar.  So, what really did happen?  The owners don’t know.  They were out of town on a vacation.  They had a house sitter at the house.  The house sitter came home and found Malcolm injured …  in the backyard … lots of blood everywhere … defecation on him … and the only other dog that had both blood and stool on him was Winchester.  The house sitter surmised that Winchester must have attacked Malcolm.  The backyard was very secure and a coyote could not possibly have jumped into this yard.

They took Malcolm to the veterinarian.  The veterinarian’s report was that it looked like two crushing blows with four different puncture wounds in different areas and two bites. The crushing blow description was due to the fact that the tissue in that area was dead, and that the ear was injured so badly that they had to do reconstructive surgery to get it back in place.

Assuming that Winchester had done this to Malcolm, the house sitter didn’t dare bring Malcolm back to the house.   As a matter of fact, Malcolm went to stay with the owner’s family while he was recovering, and once he had recovered enough he recently returned home. The owners called me in because, of course, they wanted to avoid another dogfight.

Things are just not adding up!  I look at Winchester, and Winchester is a bird dog.  He is a well-bred bird dog.  Winchester has a very gentle mouth.  As a matter of fact, the owners say of all the dogs, Winchester has the gentlest mouth. This dog was bred to retrieve a bird without crushing it!  Nothing was adding up, and as I looked at Winchester I was even more convinced that he is not even physically capable of doing that kind of damage.

Nothing about this story was making sense.  It didn’t make sense that their first fight with those kinds of injuries occurred when the owners were gone.  That would occur with two dogs that hate each other.  I didn’t see that at all.  Winchester did not look physically capable of inflicting the kind of damage or crushing blows that were described in this assault.  Then next question was (because behavior never lies), “When Malcolm came home, was he afraid of Winchester?”  The answer was, “Absolutely not.  No. They are not afraid of each other at all.”  Now, considering two dogs that have been in that kind of fight, and Malcolm with those kinds of injuries:  Malcolm would have come home and been terrified of Winchester.  And he was not.

My conclusion … Winchester did not do it.

What I visualized, I said, was that Malcolm was in the backyard, basking in the sun.  They said, “Of course, he always does.”  The other dogs were probably indoors.  I looked around the yard.  There was no way a coyote got in the yard.  The conclusion had to be that a bobcat, or perhaps a mountain lion, jumped in the yard and attacked Malcolm with crushing blows, whereby Malcolm had bled and defecated.  He knew that he might die.  Winchester was probably the first dog out the dog door followed by all the rest of the dogs, which sent the bobcat, or whatever the assailant, running.  The likelihood is that Winchester was the only one that had blood and stool on him because he enrolled himself in the fight to save Malcolm.

The family was totally relieved, and this made a lot more sense.  The youngest daughter rejoiced.  There was no way in the world Winchester was guilty of the crime he had been accused of.

The evidence did not add up.